Amor, no es amor
Then what am i feeling
What am i doing wrong
Amor, no es amor
Its just an illusion that i have in my heart
Your eyes can only see limitations
whoots. This blog is FINALLY up thanks to TRINA (and ziying). I will dedicate a post to the both of you later.
Okay, got back from OBS yesterday and i am missing it already. Actually i missed it since we got on the boat back to pungol. Like everyone, i am going to post a long post about OBS for memory sake as well and also cause i promise Trina. So here it is.
Day 1: "Welcome to OBS"
Day 1 was really a bad day for me. I was so scared and sian when we reach ubin and when i got my group, i was like "god, what kind of name is COLESTRAW? (cousteau)" but luckily rachel and sophie were in my group so it was kinda cool. 3 guides. no 4 actually. Then we were introduced to our instructors and that was when we got to meet the world's greatest instructor EVER, BIRIN! We had to pack our stuff in the store and then changed into our wet cloths cause we were going kayaking. The entire kayaking experience was great. But at that time, i really didn't enjoy it at all - having to carry the kayaks, get all wet and smelly, and had sand in our shoes. Kayak-ed with sophie and rachel and yes, we were good. *winks* haha. But Birin didn't follow us cause of his leg injury so we had another instructor.
Washed the kayaks and Birin told us to go bathe and cook our food before meeting him for "interaction session" and that was when everything we learn in guides came in. haha, we managed to pitch the tents without the instructors help. :D So it was the interaction session. Met Birin and he said "Okay, i am going to bring you all to a place but DON'T switch on your torchlights and DON'T scream, you might scare others." i tell you, at that time we were so scared, thinking that we were going for night walk but in the end we realise that he tricked us. tsk. So ended up in Ubin's greatest place ever- the jetty. It was so peaceful and nice and it was really soothing. From there we could see Singapore with all the pretty lights and i really wanted to be home. I missed everything and anything in Singapore. Interaction session was so great and we found out that there was going to be a fire drill at like 10. So the bell sounded and Lum used his stupid finger thing to try and make us move. SLEEP.
DAY1's DINNER: rice, peanuts, baked beans.
Day 2: "Only you can make a difference in your life"
Woke up really early to pack our backpacks cause we had to hike all the way to Camp 1. We had breakfast before we played some really stupid games with the other watches. It was some egg, chicken, eagle, superman, ultraman game. and guess who won?? Took the map and our bags and started heading down to camp 1. We had to complete this "obstacle" on the way which is saving a casualty to the other end of this really long log thing with no one falling off at all. The game taught us alot. We manage to finish it within an hour and that entitled us to a shorter route to camp 1. It was really hard at first but cousteau NEVER gives up. Camp 1 was pretty and clean. We got to sleep under this shelter area cause it was raining. haha, i will always remember that scene. All of us sleeping in all kinds of position around that area. Belayed and climbed. Birin tricked us AGAIN that we could sleep in the bunks. I was so happy okay. idiot. We ate as a watch in the canteen and then pitch tents, bathed and it was time to go for the expedition meeting.
Day 3: "i am here not to change people's life, but to share my experience and guide them"
EXPEDITION! ziying's group (magellan) was the navigator. We had to row boat to another island. The rowboats were huge and heavy and the ores and crazily HEAVY. After we landed on the island, we started changing behind ponchos and bushes. Got to see quite alot of people's bare butts. Hike to campsite. We were suppose to be first!! but we turn the wrong direction at the last junction so we reached there second. But it was still earlier than expected. Pitch tent and then we realise that one of our tents were missing but luckily Nila Utama found it. :D didn't bathe at all cause there were no toilets. OMG, then the highlight of the day - the pee-ing session. It was so funny okay. We all needed to pee but it was so dark and no one dared to go down to the beach by ourselves. So teresa, slyvie, cari, xiangyi, mich (i think) and i hold hands and walk down to the beach. So we stood in one straight row, one arms length apart. 1,2,3 and we pulled our pants down together and started peeing. Cari didnt do it with us cause she needed light so after we were done, i helped her to shine the light while she change her pad. omg, she is the ultimate. She took close to 10 minutes to change one pad and all of us were getting killed by the ants already. Then there was this big wave. It came so suddenly that we all screamed and when we turn to look at cari, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA IT WAS SO FUNNY. i shan't go into details cause i will definately remember that. i didn't got to see wild boars. oh i forgot to mention that xiangyi and i screamed really crazily when this huge animal ran past us. This camp taught me how to scream. ;) the sentry duty was the best. people kept knocking the sticks to scare wild boars and no one could sleep lah, including the instructors.
*knock knock knock*
"Stop knocking the sticks"
*knock knock knock*
"I SAY STOP KNOCKING THE STICKS!"
haha best <3 xiangyi SUDDENLY woke up and screamed for i have no idea what reason and someone thought she was a wild boar. hahah. I started loving my watch. oh yah! and Birin cooked this really nice meal for us. haha THANKS BIRIN! before we slept, birin told us this ghost story which wasn't true but it scared the hell out of me
Day 4: "This is the real world. Trust your instinct. Bring along your fears and jump" SEA EXPEDITION! haha cousteau was the navigator and we rock. whoots. nothing much, just kayaked and kayaked and finally we found the river. I hate the river. We kept banging into the trees and insects will drop into our boat. There was this catapillar on my sleeve and it was so so gross i almost fainted. We got lost quite a few times but in the end, CHARLIE (made up of cousteau, magellan, hillary and nila utama) worked together and we found the mud barn. The mud barn was so irritating. I was so tired just helping all the boats up and back out into the river. I slipped a couple of times and finally all the boats were out. We started off really late but in the end we were so much ahead of schedule cause Charlie rocks big time. We found the second obstacle really fast and we had lunch which was our ration food and we set off. Found the way out to sea again and the sense of achievement was overwelming. We saw our destination and together as charlie, we form our diamond and moved forwards despite all our tiredness. Our spirits got lifted and we sang and sang until we reach the place. We reached at like 3 and all of us started keeping our kayaks and stuff and we gathered together in a circle where Lum announced that WE DID IT! The sense of achievement was really really great. I am so proud of everyone. Then Birin told us that we were going to do jetty jump. I was so scared okay. But before we jumped, Birin asked us to close our eyes again and he said "You all have done well. You all have been through alot together and this will be the last thing we will do before all of you leave OBS. I won't call this an activity, i won't force you to it. This jump is a meaningful jump. Bring your fears along with you when you jump and throw it away into the sea. Believe in yourself" and i started tearing.
We really have been through alot alot alot. As a watch. As Charlie. And after that, i didn't hesitate at all to just jump down and get rid of all my fears. Everyone did it. We went back to store, bathed, and met Birin for dinner. He was so nice cause he helped us cook our dinner. Dinner never tasted that nice before. I guess the last night together as Cousteau really made me start loving OBS. It was the last night as a watch. Dinner was fun. No one cared about the insects or the dirtiness anymore. We just sat together, ate, laughed and talked. We wrote a song for Birin and we requested to go to the jetty for the last night. The atmosphere was so gloomy. He told us to think about something we missed and then he said "This is your last night here. Look around you and enjoy this scenery for the last time." i think. really, at that time no one in my watch was homesick. we were really enjoying the last few hours together at that jetty. We sang him the song and he was really touched. We all started crying. I love Cousteau. I love Birin. oh yah, teresa and i went waited for cari for a long time again cause she was in the toilet and it was lights out already.
Day 5: "this is our last circle"
Day 5 was worse than Day 1 cause we had to leave all this behind. We were leaving ubin. The five days past really fast. We bonded alot as a watch and i guess it was hard to leave it behind. Packed our store and bags before meeting Birin for our last circle. It was raining which gave this really sad atmosphere. We sang "My Love" to him and did a commitment thing. Bought stuff then gathered around for the last briefing. Did stupid surveys. And then Birin asked us to form the really last cirlce and he was like "This is the our last circle. I don't believe i should be the one to give out the certificates because you all did it together" so he gave us different certificates and we gave each other the certificates. We really finished it. We sang him the song again in front of other watches and all of us cried once again. I think Cousteau cried close to 4 times on the last day. We didn't manage to say a proper bye to him. Back to school.
This camp had a great impact on me. It changed me actually. I was pushed beyond my limits and this wasn't possible at all if i didn't had Cousteau and Birin. I LOVE YOU ALL COUSTEAU!
Thank you Rachel for guiding us safely and quickly back to camp 2 and helping me hold the poncho while i change.
Thank you Sophie for helping out whenever you can and kayaking together with rachel and i back to "home".
Thank you Trina for being so high and crazy and cam-whoring with me and also for coming out with the tune for the song.
Thank you Mich for being our broken down radio. Continue singing cause music = life.
Thank you Xiangyi for just being so crappy. Its a torture sleeping next to your tent with all that sleep talking going on. haha. and have fun with your baby. OH yah, i will never forgive you for taking a picture of my bare butt.
Thank you Theresa for the stupid times together when we were waiting for Cari to finish her shitting and lying to us that you weren't from choir.
Thank you Cari for that wonderful highlight of the night on the third day. haha, don't shit so long next time.
Thank you Slyvie for being so strong and tough and helping us carry all the heavy heavy stuff. Thank you Denise for helping us pack the store when we were all so slack to do anything. You da best!
Thank you Cindy for carrying big pot all around and helping us to row the boat for a long time. Thank you Jenem for being such a great eater and clearing up our food. haha
Thank you Dhanu for all your great ideas and openess.
Thank you Jesselyn for being SO EVER HELPFUL!
Thank you Jingli for just cooperating and helping out whenever you can.
and last but definately not least, THANK YOU BIRIN! You really impacted me alot. From all the sessions with you, i learn alot alot of things and i realise alot of stuff i was oblivious to at first. You are a great instructor and you made me feel so protected and safe and thats why i was willing to give everything a shot. Thank you for not forcing us and don't worry, you have done your job well. All of us Cousteau are really happy to have you as our instructor. I will remember all your encouragements, all the tricks you played on us and all the good and bad times we had together as a watch. Its sad to not be able to say a proper goodbye to you. Maybe ten years down the road, you might not remember us but you will definately be remembered by every single one of us.
<3
Okay, i think i should end here. I have much more to say but i guess i should just keep all these memories inside me. Thank you Cousteau for being there for me and for all the good memories i had. I am glad that i met you all at this camp and whatever happens in future, we will always be Cousteau.
I am glad to be back too though. Loads of things i missed. My friends, my family and everything. Its great to be home. :)
Saturday, 16 June 2007 // 17:46